Goal Blindness & it’s Antidote
This season of life is simultaneously a logically hurricane,
birth of a massive dream, and grief as we close a chapter in our life. I bounce
between a human to do list, an excited Jack Russell terrier, and a sentimental
cry baby.
Needless to say, I’ve been struggling to be present in the
here and now. I’m rushing towards the goal of getting on plane and forgetting
the real goal of enjoying life and relationships. Unfortunately, this isn’t the
first time I’ve fallen into this pattern. It’s so common in my life, I’ve named
it. (Insert face palm emoji here.)
Goal Blindness
Goal blindness is when the pursuit of a goal accidentally becomes counter to your intended value. I think examples are the only way to covey this phenomenon.
Goal blindness is injuring myself to complete a fitness program. I forgot my true value was feeling my best.
Goal blindness is the chaotic Christmas frenzy. I forgot my true value was enjoying my family and celebrating a scared season.
Now, goal blindness is relentlessly working our 100 item to do list. I’m forgetting my true value is to savor each season of life. This is a truly unique and special season, too. No, we’re not yet ziplining through the rain forest, snorkeling a reef, or discovering a new cultures cuisine.
We are doing the emotional work of letting go. The logically work of selling our house, sailboat, 2 cars, and hundreds of smaller items. The exciting and wildly uncertain work of launching a dream. (If I’m honest, it’s overwhelming to even write all that down!)
Antidote
We are desperately attempting to manage an ounce of sanity in the midst of it all. Between packing boxes, changing our address, and driving 14 hours to deliver the sailboat, we cling to a few moments when we just stop. Stop and notice. Take it all in. We’re occasionally making space to downshift and absorb this beautiful season. Right here, right now.
We spent two afternoons swimming with dear friends.
We watched it rain in the sunlight.
We saw a sunset.
We watched a new Disney movie.
We played in the rain, twice!
We played board games, petted kitty cats, & a puppy.
We sat around the dining room table eating tacos.
We got vulnerable as a family when Kate posed the most entertaining conversation starters.
- “What is the worst thing you’ve ever done in your whole life?”
- “What’s the sourest thing you’ve ever tasted?”
- “Tell me a funny story I’ve never heard before.”
Maybe mindfulness is the antidote to goal blindness?
5 Comments
Anne
Love this blog post. So glad you’re looking at this issue. We get so busy we forget to stop and savor the moment and to make memories. I remember President Obama stopping on his way off the (2nd) inauguration platform. He turned around to look out over the sea of people, and you could hear him say, “Wait just a second, I want to remember this.”
I hope you guys continue to stop and savor the moments in life – Rallying cry: create memories!
Love,
Anne
Martha
Ahh yes, love that image!!
Deidre
Goal blindness consumes me often, and usually in big waves. If it helps, I’m also in a limbo of emotions with your adventure ahead. The excitement and living vicariously through this goal you have ahead. Then there’s the grief of being something that has to be let go for some time. I’m glad that in these days of mad dash for the door that we have been able to steal even just a moment of stop time that you have.
Martha
We’ve appreciated your kindness so much. Kate soaks in every moment!!
Rebecca
Girl! I felt this one.